The Unplugged Wedding by Nicole Clark

Wedding guests playing photographer.  It's been a pet peeve of mine since the beginning for so many reasons.  I was so thrilled when one of my brides, Nicole Clark, told me she was having an UNPLUGGED wedding.  At first, I've never even heard of this term and she had to explain it to me.  When I knew what it was, I wanted to give her the biggest hug I've ever given!  It was like Christmas for me, and this was the best gift she could ever give me.  After reading an article about unplugged weddings, I asked Nicole if she could write a blog for me, from her perspective as an unplugged bride.  And because she's awesome, she agreed and wrote this AMAZING post.  I present to you, Nicole Clark, the Unplugged Bride.

.........................................................................................

Many of us are guilty of becoming an amateur paparazzi, hiding behind the camera to capture the moments of our loved ones on their wedding day. But it wasn't until I was planning my own wedding that I actually realized how obnoxious it can be. 

When our friends and family members heard about our decision to have an unplugged wedding, we got the same 2 questions, in order, every time. The first; "What is an unplugged wedding?" An unplugged wedding is where the bride and groom request that their guests put their cell phones away, silenced or off as well as their cameras. 

The second question was always, "Why can't I take my own pictures?". The reasons can vary from each couple and their feelings towards this issue. Some choose to do so because they don't want anyone beating them to the punch by posting photos on social networking sites. Let's face it, this can cause a lot of issues, especially if someone happens to post a picture of the bride or groom before they even see each other. For others, it can be an issue of distraction because who really wants to hear the sound of all those cameras snapping away as you say your vows to your husband or wife. Some couple want their ceremony to be a private and sacred event so cameras are banned to uphold the wishes of the couple. For others, it's a control issue because they want to be the only ones distributing photos of their wedding.

Our reasons were a bit different. 

When we told our family that we were having an unplugged wedding, we were asked why and people even got upset to the point to argue. We got married in front of a giant fish tank in low lighting and we knew that most people would not think and use their flash. That would cause a reflection off the tank, thus ruining the professional pictures we were paying for. 

That reason was not simple enough because the general response was "Well, I just wont use a flash". yeah, doubtful. 

To tell you the truth, even if we had picked a different venue, our decision would still be the same. For me, it was about respect for my photographers. You spend so much time seeking out a professional that best suits your needs, vision and budget, do you really want your memories to be ruined by Aunt Sally, Cousin Joe and anyone else sticking their camera in the air which will more than likely block your photographers view?

These people are professionals and it is their job is to blend into the back round and get those special shots that will last a lifetime. Most guests don't even realize they are even in the way. It makes your photographer's job difficult when they have to try to dodge all the guests taking their own pictures so they can get the shots you are paying for. 

We also chose this because because we wanted our guests to emerge from behind their electronics and be fully present in the moment with us. This is such a special time for the couple so the friends and family should do nothing but enjoy being witnesses to the union of husband to wife. They can always request or order copies of all the photos at a later date. 

Most couples only think about the the ceremony and reception but what about during the "posed" photos? 

Think of it this way, would you want someone watching over your shoulder as you work? So we took it one step further with the "ban on electronics". As most families do, I knew my parents and grandparents would attempt to get their own pictures during the times we were taking family formals or wedding party photos. This is something most photographers hate whether they say it or not, so I wanted to prevent it.  

Implementing this request helped our photographers to do their jobs with the freedom of knowing that our guests weren't going to be a problem to overcome. In my opinion, it helped everything to run a bit smoother and we were left with beautiful memories and the photos to show it. We did not ban cameras at the reception but by that time, nobody was worried about taking pictures and I have never seen my family enjoy themselves so much without the need to take pictures.

It has been over 2 months since my wedding and we are still getting remarks from our guests saying things like they never realized how distracting it is to be a shutterbug at other weddings. 

I hope after reading this, more couples will chose to help themselves and their photographers by having an unplugged wedding, or at least as a guest, remember to put those cameras away and stay in the moment. Remember, the bride and groom have hired and paid for a professional for a reason so relax and let them do their jobs!

~ Nicole ~